Black-Eyed Pea Therapy

It is an old southern tradition to eat black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day for good luck and prosperity.  So my first New Year’s resolution is to eat black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day.  My second New Year’s resolution is to blog about how to create “good luck and prosperity” everyday, with or without the black-eyed peas.

Just what is good luck?  In my world, good luck is a set of fortuitous circumstances visited upon a person that results in an emotional energetic response of gratitude and joy.  The problem is that we believe that we have to wait for good luck to spontaneously show up.  While we are waiting for the arrival of good luck, we are often cranky, cynical, snarky, negative and pessimistic, energetic emotions that are the antithesis of joy and gratitude.

Therefore, I propose that a welcoming environment for good luck and prosperity to materialize is one of gratitude and joy.  Remember, Einstein said “Everything is energy.  Energy attracts a similar energy.”

Join me in a crusade to create good luck and prosperity by consciously choosing to experience gratitude and joy. 

Start a gratitude journal where you regularly record the people and circumstances that you treasure in your life.  Oprah says that keeping a gratitude journal changed her life.  Keeping a gratitude journal has certainly changed my life.  Even if you choose not to write down the people and things you are grateful for, you can bring these things into your conscious awareness several times a day.  This practice is “soul medicine” and you will surely reap the benefits if you resolve to choose gratitude and joy everyday. 

Don’t take my word for it.  Try it and see what happens.  I would love to hear from you about the good luck and prosperity that start showing up in your life when you embark on your black-eyed pea therapy.  Send me an email or visit my website.http://www.susanboyes.com/  Happy New Year!

Relationship Insurance

The holidays mark special celebrations in addition to Christmas and Chanukah, such as engagements and weddings.  Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve provide perfect settings for proposals, diamond rings, and marriages. 

The timing insures that no one will forget the date of these special occasions.  The day you get engaged and the day you get married are surely two of the happiest days of your life.  Your heart and mind are overflowing with love and great expectations.  As much as you want to sustain the euphoria of new love, any seasoned married veteran will tell you that a healthy marriage or relationship takes some work. 

The problem is that often a novice couple doesn’t know the correct steps to take to navigate a strong relationship. This is where couple or marriage counseling plays an important role.  As a relationship counselor, I can observe communication glitches and self-defeating behavior patterns before they sabotage a relationship, creating unnecessary pain and walls of resentment.  I also use a tool, the Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory that allows me to make“map” of a couple’s personality preferences.  From that map, I can predict where conflict is likely to occur and make suggestions about how to avoid the conflict.

Before you tie the knot, get premarital counseling.  If you are a married couple or you are in a committed relationship and you are struggling, consider marriage or couple counseling.  You owe it to yourself and your partner to learn how to love each better.  An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.  For more information, email me at susanboyes@susanboyes.com or visit my website.

Use Your Mind to Heal Your Body

Would you like to mobilize your body's natural abilities to reduce or eliminate dis-ease?  Understanding how your body and mind partner to create pain and certain health conditions is the first step.  Mind/Body Syndrome is the way your body expresses repressed emotions.  Here is how it works: when events arouse intense emotions like anger, rage, fear, and shame, we feel overwhelmed and bury the feelings.  With no other outlet, the repressed emotions manifest as physical symptoms.  Once this happens, the focus becomes diagnosing and treating the physical symptoms to the exclusion of the emotional triggers.  Medical intervention may work temporarily; but what usually happens is that the symptoms return or manifest in a different set of symptoms. 

People with Mind/Body Syndrome often exhibit personality traits such as stoicism, perfectionism, and self-criticism.  They may be people-pleasers or worry-warts.

Dr. John Sarno, author and ground-breaking medical pioneer in the field of mind/body syndrome says, "There are literally hundreds of disorders and illnesses that have been identified as purely psychosomatic.  Yet, amazingly, in spite of the nearly universal prevalence of such disorders, the practice of mind body medicine is almost totally unknown within today's medical community, and plays virtually no part in contemporary medical study and research". 

Common symptoms of Mind/Body Syndrome include: gastrointestinal problems, fibromylgia, sexual dysfunction, chronic fatigue, hypertension, dermatitis, chronic pain, headaches, depression, anxiety/panic disorder, insomnia, eating disorders and allergies.  If you suffer from any of these conditions or any other chronic, undiagnosed health condition, chances are you have Mind/Body Syndrome.  For more information about MBS, visit my website and order my CD Use Your Mind to Heal Your Body.

The Perfect Gift

Are you looking for the perfect gift for your special someone?  How does free, easy to get, and sure to bring pleasure for a looooong time sound to you?  You’ve heard that “It’s not the gift; it’s the thought that counts”.  Well, in this case, that is precisely the point.  Follow these simple instructions and you are guaranteed to have a happy relationship and a happy partner:

1.      Before your feet hit the floor in the morning, complete this sentence: I am so happy and grateful that (name)______________ is in my life because ________________, ______________, and ______________. 

2.      *Complete this sentence: I am so happy and grateful that I today I ______________________________________________________________.

3.      Take a couple of deep breaths and SMILE.

Better yet, write out your affirmations.  Now you are ready to start your day.

When you follow this daily routine, here is what happens.  First you set an intention to focus on gratitude which raises you energy frequency and causes your brain to send signals to your body to produce the feel-good chemicals endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin.  Your energy field (the space around your body) is lighter, brighter and more loving and compassionate.

People in your immediate environment are unconsciously affected by the vibes you are sending out so they enjoy how they feel in your presence. This is a recipe for a strong, reciprocal relationship.  Repeated on a daily basis, you can alter your neural circuitry (brain patterns) and your neuro-chemistry so you consistently feel better about your partner and yourself.  What a fabulous gift! 

*Examples: am healthy, am loved, have a job, receive an unexpected windfall, attract success, am a father/mother, have friends, am brilliant, have an appointment with my marriage counselor, etc. 

Energy Psychology: an Alternative to Prescription Drugs

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration found that 45 million Americans experienced some form of mental illness in 2009.  According to a government study, antidepressants have become the most commonly prescribed drugs in the United States. They're prescribed more than drugs to treat high blood pressure, high cholesterol, asthma, or headaches. It would appear that depression is diagnosed more often than many common physical conditions and that antidepressant drugs are the treatment of choice.  So Americans are reporting more depression and taking more prescription drugs to alleviate their painful symptoms.  Clearly, something is amiss here.

Many studies suggest that antidepressant drug therapy is only slightly more effective than placebos.  More studies suggest that exercise is the most effective treatment for depression.  Since many Americans can’t find the time or motivation to exercise, what other treatment options are available to the 45 million Americans suffering from depression and other forms of mental illness?

Energy Psychology may be the answer.  Energy Psychology is a new paradigm for healing dysfunctional emotions and the negative thought patterns and self-defeating behavior that support those emotions. Healing the emotions is the gateway to a happier, healthier experience of a fulfilling life. Energy Psychology is based on clinical trials that show that stimulating energy points on the surface of the skin alters psychological states by creating shifts in neuro-chemistry, thoughts, feelings, and behavior.

Energy points are also known as meridian points or acupressure points.  Energy psychology techniques allow the practitioner to stimulate meridian points by tapping acupressure points on the face and upper body to relieve anxiety and other emotional problems. Tapping meridian points releases blocked electromagnetic energy in the body to restore a harmonious flow of energy that supports health and vitality. 

If you want to know more about Energy Psychology and how the simple, safe techniques can help you enjoy the health and well-being you deserve, please contact me by visiting my website.

Holiday Survival Skills for Men

We all know that men and women see many things very differently.  This holiday season will be a learning experience for many men who make the major mistake of selecting the wrong gift for their special woman.  A blunder of this nature can take on gargantuan proportions.

The first Christmas my husband and I were together, he gave me a blender.  He even used a 20% off coupon I gave him for a department store.  Because this was our first Christmas together, I had knocked myself out decorating, cooking, shopping, gift-wrapping, and making other holiday preparations for his three sons and my four daughters. I wanted everything to be perfect.  

Everyone was having a wonderful time Christmas morning tearing into their gifts.  I kept wondering what was under the tree for me.  When I finally unwrapped the blender, an ungodly rage erupted inside of me.  I wanted rip his arms off and pummel his stupid head with them.  Although, I resisted the urge toward violence, believe me he paid dearly for his indiscretion in equally painful consequences.

Now I leave nothing to chance.  Well in advance of an occasion, I remind him that the event is coming up and I tell him exactly what I want and where to buy it.  He is wise enough to follow my directions, including having it beautifully wrapped.  It is a win-win victory.  If you want to preserve a happy marriage or a joyful relationship, guys don’t buy the wrong gift.  If your relationship is in a free fall, maybe I can help. Email me at susanboyes@susanboyes.com or visit my website.

Cyber Monday Deals

In case you didn’t already know it, today is another Cyber Monday, when online buyers snag the best deals from retailers offering great discounts . Cyber Monday was the second highest spending day of 2009, with buyers charging nearly $890 million during the special shopping event. Finding a great deal on a prized item is a soul-satisfying experience most of us delight in. We love sharing our good fortune with friends and families by sharing the details of our opportune purchase.

You know what else brings the same profound satisfaction? Meditating regularly releases the same feel-good hormones, endorphins and serotonin. Some studies suggest that meditation practiced on a regular basis is as effective as medication in alleviating symptoms of anxiety and depression. Meditation is non-invasive, free, and has no side effects.

During meditation, the brain produces an alpha wave pattern identical to that state of deep relaxation when one is falling asleep or awakening. Alpha brain wave patterns benefit the mind/body in the following ways:
• Calms your body and mind while maintaining alertness
• Stimulates imagination, intuition and heightened awareness
• Allows for detachment from the outcome
• Improves memory, concentration, and mental clarity
• Improves sleep patterns and overall health
• Reduces muscle tension, chronic pain, and headaches
• Lowers high blood pressure
• Enhances the immune system
• Increases serotonin production and reduces anxiety and depression
• Helps in post-operative healing

Many people are intimidated by the idea of meditating. The basics of meditating effectively include deep, rhythmic breathing, soothing mental imagery and deep relaxation. I have developed a library of meditation CDs that facilitates the novice and practiced meditator in achieving fast and effective results with a minimum of effort. . If you are stressed out, can’t sleep, experiencing health problems or just want to feel better in general, try meditating.